I realize I am the cause of so many problems. So much so that I've had to make you force yourself into doing something that's so hard. Emotionally, psychologically and physically. Each time I tell you I'm going to change, I disappoint. I guess all I'm good for is disappointing eh? Since it happens every single time. Sigh.

And when you change for me, I'm not happy. Why? Because for my own selfish reasons, I hate it when you're down. What's wrong with me? Shouldn't I be happy? No, I guess not. Because as much as you changing for me supposedly makes things better, I feel guilty now. No, I'm not blaming you. It's just my guilty conscience acting up.

I hope we can weather this through together. I want to be happy, I want you to be happy, and most importantly I want us to be happy. Thank you for all you've done for me, it's time for me to do some self-reflection. For our sake.

I'm exhausted and I need to rest. I need to stop being so childish. Stop being so selfish, unaware, oblivious etc.

Goodbye.